Recently I was asked to help provide food for the elderly or ill at church, and I said no.
What I should have said was “not right now,” but I said no. Actually, I said “I don’t think anyone would want my food,” then gave a face saying “please don’t make me do this!”
My husband didn’t agree with my decision. He made the point that I didn’t have to bring something homemade. But I’m still not there emotionally. Yes, the whole point of this blog is to find my talent, but it’s also to build up my self-esteem and build confidence. It takes A LOT of confidence to go to a stranger’s house and bring them food. If it was someone I already knew, sure I don’t mind, but I don’t know most of the people (I haven’t been going to this congregation for very long).
Also, in our ladies bible class, we’re reading Improving Your Serve by Charles R. Swindoll, and it’s about putting aside selfishness and putting on humility in order to serve people around you. On page 17, he says:
A good self-esteem is not the same as selfishness. Without a strong belief in ourselves, we are easily crippled and wounded in life. A poor self-image is not to be equated with humility or the mark of a servant. As a matter of fact, without a healthy ego, without the confidence that God is in us, on our side, pulling for us, we become fragile, easily bruised, counterproductive people.
And I admit, a little of my insecurities is my lack of confidence in God working through me. I once read, “Faith is not the belief God can do something; faith is the belief God will do something for you.” And that’s so true in my case. I believe God can move a mountain, and I believe God does wondrous things through other people… but not me. Why? Because I’m too scared to let Him.
My solution: practice making a go-to casserole. Something I think everyone would like, a complete meal, something I can make in an aluminum pan, take it, and drop it off with Jay or a friend with me, so I don’t have to do it alone!
Now…what should I make…hmmm… I’ll keep you posted. Once I pick something I’ll attempt to make it. Attempt being the key word here.
2 comments:
I have plenty of suggests for you if you want to learn how to make an easy casserole...let me know when and we can do it together! :)
And you can always take your husband with you, or even a friend, to drop off the food. That may help you with the confidence aspect.
And yes, you could totally buy fried chicken or pizza as well and take it to someone in need. It's the act, not the food, that matters.
Love you!
I actually had pizza / lasanga / and buffalo wings delivered to a couple at our church after they had their 2nd chilc! I had signed up to deliver food and got very nervous and busy...anyway, I called the pizza place, paid for it over the phone, and they delivered it! And the dad loved the buffalo wings!
Go you for attempting, that's the best part!
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