I read The Magnolia Story by Chip and Joanna Gaines (yes, I know I’m late to the party), and it really spoke to me. I related to Jo more than I thought I would. She’s seemingly perfect in every way, how could I relate?! I’m not wrapped up in grandiose thinking or anything like that, she’s a self-proclaimed introvert that observes details, and she developed her skill over time. I enjoyed reading about her revelation about motherhood, as well.
What hit me most of all was my own lack of vulnerability towards my artistic side. Yes, I have one! It may be small, but it’s there. I’ve been known to be a trendsetter, ya know! In 7th grade, I bought a purse and like 3 other people bought the same one! When we moved into the Kaufman house, I wanted to decorate my room with a dress form. My mom and I looked everywhere for one under $500 with no luck. Now, you can’t turn around in Hobby Lobby without running into one. Oh! And I was into flamingos way before they’re the hit they are now.
Although tongue in cheek, I don’t want to deny that imagination or taste I had before. In fact, before committing to Texas A&M, my path was to attend University of North Texas to study Fashion Merchandising (like Rachel Green). In the book, Jo and Chip talk about sketching in notebooks – I sketched wedding dresses all the time. Another fun fact… I designed my bridesmaid dresses (my inspiration was Monica Geller’s bridesmaid dress… man, I was obsessed!). I don’t think they turned out half-bad. They may look a little homemade, but not bad.
Thus far, I’ve chopped it up to not having enough money, but I was able to go to Home Good and window shop. And smile. And not envy everyone or pout because I can't buy everything in sight. Of course, I found something for Owen’s room that I want to go back and get next week :)
All of that to say… I’m not creating a design blog or anything like (I have plenty of wonderful and talented friends that design if you need recommendations), I’m just allowing myself to appreciate art.
Oh yeah! I was in Picture Memory in UIL in 3rd and 4th grade and I took an Art History class in college. See! I can be artistic! I’m never going to have an eye for photography, though. That – I don’t get. Can you tell I’m still trying to convince myself that I can have an artistic eye?!
So from now on, I’m going to daydream, I'm going to window shop, I’m going to follow my gut, and I’m going to have self-compassion if I screw it all up.