Things they never tell you about childbirth… or they did and I just didn’t listen*

-          Contractions aren’t that bad… until you’ve have them consistently for hours and you just want them to stop!

-          Episiotomies are the devil. But they only hurt for 10 days (+/-)

-          Epidurals, however, are the greatest! Highly recommend it!

-          Hospital beds are not comfortable. My labor would have been much easier if it weren’t for the bed. But I have back issues anyway.

-          Eat your fiber! You’ll be grateful afterwards!

-          Bring make-up. I was dumb and brought “tinted” moisturizer… yeah, not the same thing!

-          Bring comfortable, stretchy pants to go home in.

-          Bring multiple changes of clothes for LO (little one)

-          Nursing isn’t painless, but tolerable.

-          Take care of those bad boys! It does hurt when they crack and bleed, however. And it’s hard to recover from it.

-          It’s ok if you have to supplement with formula. And get as many free samples before birth as you can! And at the hospital! It will save you. If you don’t need it, you can give it away.

-          Boxers really are great with babies.

-          People, at least those that surround me, are absolutely wonderful. I’m extremely blessed.

-          Let people bring you food… you’ll want it!

-          It really doesn’t matter what your house looks like the first few weeks. People just see the baby. (I’m really hoping this one is true!!)

-          Have at least one small package of diapers in every size. It will suck when you realize you’re out after you’ve already taken the diaper off.

-          You’ll have to buy new clothes because either your shirts won’t fit due to “nursing,” or your pants won’t fit. Maternity pants fall off, but pre-pregnancy pants are still too small. I had to buy a pair of jeans two sizes larger than my normal size… and that’s ok :)

-          Most importantly, it’s hard to please everyone. You’re going to forget to call someone, you’re going to have to tell visitors “no,” you’re going to have to take the baby away to nurse whether the person holding him wants you to or not.

-          BUT don’t forget your husband!

Feel free to add to the list!

*These are obviously my own, personal feelings.